It's my birthday tomorrow. I've celebrated a lot of birthdays with friends lately and while some have been ecstatic start the year ahead, others have approached their milestone with trepidation and dread of getting older. It's different for everyone and so many can't stand the thought of getting older, of creeping closer and closer to the big 3-0. I've never understood this, I love celebrating my birthday and being with all my friends and family, I love celebrating all I have achieved in the previous years and getting excited for all that is yet to come. This one feels like a particularly special birthday because not only does it mark two-and-a-half years travelling solo but after being ill for my birthday last year it feels like it should be a double celebration!
These past three years have quite seriously been the best years of my life - you know when you're 18-21 and everyone says make the most of every second because these are your best years? Well I couldn't disagree more. Yes, 18-21 was a lot of fun and I will never forget those years, but if you ask me, my years just get better with age. My priorities are different, I'm capable and know exactly what I want out of life. I have disposable income and complete financial independence, I have goals, I have a business I have created out of nothing. Much as those years were special in their own way, I was only just starting to become the person I am now, but if you ask me, it was the events that happened in my mid-twenties that really turned me into the woman I am today.So many people fear getting older but if you ask me, we just get better, wiser, more creative, interesting and vibrant as individuals as we grow and change. Sometimes when travelling I go through phases where I'll be spending a lot of time with younger first-time travellers and I will feel the difference in our ages. But instead of feeling like the old gal who should have settled down by now, instead I feel like celebrating because I have so much more freedom than these travellers. I have finished my studies, I've set up an online business that will support my travels around the world, I have no-one to tell me what to do and I am in control of my own life. I am a traveller who has seen over 30 countries in my life and I have no plans to stop just yet - while this life may not be forever, it is for now and I'm a very lucky girl to have taken it on in the way I have.
So while I will be spending this weekend celebrating with the amazing friends I have made at my hostel in Perth, thousands of miles away from home where I spent my last birthday, my heart will be with all the amazing people whose support has helped get me to this point of my life. I couldn't have done it without any of you. But in true Absolutely Lucy style, I'll be drunk as a skunk at a bush rave somewhere this weekend before setting off on my outback adventure up the West Coast next week. A pretty perfect way to celebrate if you ask me - I may be getting on a bit but I'll always be a party girl at heart so it seems only right to enjoy the day before setting out on the trip of a lifetime.
Today marks the start of a brand new adventure. Yesterday, I sat in my apartment attempting to squeeze my life into my backpack and felt like I was standing on the edge of a precipice about to jump. Oh god how I've missed that feeling. I've missed the feeling of freedom and excitement at picking up and starting again somewhere new and different. I've been back in Melbourne for five months after living here for five months last year - don't get me wrong, Melbourne has turned into a home from home for me and remains one of my absolute favourite places in the world. But when you know it's time to go, it's time to go.
Living in the city, both times, has been a real challenge with surreal highs and some crazy lows that have left me questioning everything. Every time I come here, I seem to end up in jobs that push me to the very end of my tether and while I've loved my cocktail waitress gig and have had an amazing time working on a rooftop bar all summer - I am more than ready to move on and get back to traveller life. This last few months have been both amazing and exhausting - I've worked too much in my goal to save as much money as possible and I've had to sacrifice my writing due to lack of time and routine. But at the same time, I've made some amazing new friends and I've had some pretty special adventures in this city and beyond. I don't regret a single second of it, but I know that out there a healthier and happier life is waiting for me, so I think it's about time I went and found it.
This past week has been a flurry of goodbyes and leaving drinks, after living here for a total of ten months I've picked up a pretty special crowd along the way. I want to say a huge thank you to every single person, who no matter how short a time we spent together, really made my Melbourne experience. Now I plan to finish my time here with a bang, tonight I'm heading to a pretty incredible house I've rented with my friends for a joint-birthday celebration along Great Ocean Road. We'll be spending the weekend there and, just as it should be, I'll be finishing my time in Melbourne with the people who mean the most to me. Follow me on Instagram and check out my InstaStories for all the live updates.
So what's next for Absolutely Lucy?
On Monday I'll be flying to Adelaide, where I'll be catching up with an old friend and checking out the city for a week. I'm definitely going to need a chilled week after this hectic last few weeks in Melbourne! Then I'm heading to Perth, where I'm hoping to find some road trip buddies to start heading up the West Coast with - it's been a dream trip for a long time and I'm so excited to be on the road again. I can't wait for the sunshine and beaches after this last week of rain in Melbourne, get me tanned, fit and healthy again. I've slipped into so many bad habits lately, not sleeping enough, barely eating and drinking way too much - hospo life has definitely got the better of me - so now I'm looking forward to taking care of myself for a while.
I'm excited to get back to blogging and to be able to focus on my passion for a while instead of working the same repetitive job and having the same conversations over and over again. Being a waitress in the bar was fun but I'm so much more than that and I can't wait to pursue the things I really love, to have the time and the energy to be creative again. I'll miss my big city life, my cute little apartment all to myself with a gym downstairs, my local coffee shop and bars where the staff remember my orders, my work crew and how much they cared about each other. I'll miss the families I found in my neighbours, my work crew and my besties I've met all over Australia. Melbourne is an incredible city but it is always the people who make the place and I've been lucky enough to meet some amazing characters who I already can't wait to see again. Next week I'll have lots more to share with you all - trust me I have a lot of adventures to catch you all up on! But for now Melbourne, over and out.
Do you ever have that feeling that no matter how hard you work to cram everything in, you're always running out of time? That ticking clock in the back of your mind is your worst enemy when it comes to getting shit done and can demotivate us in seconds. How often have you felt psyched up for the day, then you've seen your mounting to-do list, saw time ticking away from you and just figured "I don't even know where to start so I'm gonna sit down, have a cup of tea and a biscuit." We've all been there but it's so easy when you're travelling full time or working flat out to let the basic life admin slide. By life admin, I'm talking about all those basic things like cooking, cleaning, washing - all the things that make your house feel like a home you want to return to at the end of the day, the things that make you feel like you're looking after yourself. These are so much more important than you think because looking after yourself is the first step - forget to do this and your motivation for achieving anything else will quickly drip away.For those who are working flat out but feel they are so overwhelmed with their workload that they lose any drive to get things done - this is the perfect time to change your outlook. I remember when I used to let work get on top of me - I'll fully admit I still do at times because I'll always be a workaholic who can't say no to working more hours. But the difference is I'm able to recognise when life is getting on top of me and I make sure I take a step back and give myself the time to recuperate and relax before I tackle my to-do list, that way I know when I do sit down to work, I'm doing the best job I can possibly do. Because if you ask me, if you don't give a job 100+% there is pretty much no point doing it at all. So this post is about sharpening your focus and making sure that the time you spend working is super productive so that you can spend more time relaxing and enjoying yourself.
Here are my top tips for boosting productivity:
And most importantly? Don't see failure as this big dark cloud hanging over your head all the time. It's okay if you can't do everything - we are not machines and we should never feel like failures for not being able to squeeze everything in. I should never feel like I have to apologise for being a 26-year-old who travels solo full time, works 45 hours a week at one job, works as a freelance journalist and travel blogger, who manages to keep her apartment clean, tidy, cook great meals from scratch but sometimes doesn't manage to FaceTime her friends and family at home as much because of the time difference. Yes I'm failing big time in that respect at the moment and it makes me feel very guilty when I don't know what is happening in all my loved ones lives because we are on other sides of the planet. But I'm working my ass off over here and getting shit done, and they understand that. Sometimes we go through phases where we have to sacrifice something in order to achieve other great things, and that's okay. That's not failure.
What are your top tips for being your most productive self? Do you ever feel like you're failing because of the sacrifices you have to make?
As you read this, my travels will have already started and I thought it was important to write this post and share what has probably been the hardest part of my decision to leave. The first thing everyone has asked me upon finding out I was going travelling was "are you going with your boyfriend?". When I replied no on each occasion, I saw the same surprised blank faces in front of me - particularly when I announced I was going it alone. I'm not sure why it is such a shock to people as I've always been quite an independent person - but clearly it seems quite odd to a lot of people that we would be able to go without each other for any length of time. To paint a picture for those who don't know us, me and Wolfy have been together for well over eight years. We've survived all sorts, including me moving away for university for three years, and defied all those who said we'd never last or that we weren't suited - amazingly there were a lot of people who felt that way. But we made it this far and we seem to be doing better than okay. So I can totally understand why people think "they love each other, therefore they must not be able to live without each other".
Relationships always face difficulties at some point - a hurdle that pops up out of nowhere, whether a problem between the two of you, or interference from outside sources. But when you've been together as long as we have, and from as young an age, sometimes the problems that crop up are actually just dreams that pull you in opposite directions. We've all got dreams, big ideas and hopes for the things we want to achieve, see and do - but what happens when they clash with those of the one we love? Well we're faced with a big decision about what to do. This is actually something that's been playing on my mind a lot lately because I have a few friends who, although in slightly different situations, have struggled with similarly big decisions. I guess it is a common theme in our twenties that we will be faced with big choices over our relationships - our teens are the easy time, although they may not feel like it, when nothing really tests us other than ourselves. Even the separation of university is something that can be easy to live with because to an extent we still have a choice over distance and whether we want to go the distance. But by the time we hit our twenties, we are looking at careers, new homes, marriage and babies in some cases, and travel. There are so many more factors that will affects our relationships and we will be forced into difficult decisions.I'm not the only one who has found this, I actually know several people who have found lately that they have had to choose one aspect of their life over another. One friend has chosen to move two-and-a-half hours away from all of her friends and family, leaving behind a job she had worked her way up to, in order to follow her boyfriend. He was moving to a much better job and she had to take a pay cut in order to be with him, but for her the decision was the right one for her because she loves him and wants to be with him. Now they are able to live together, instead of breaking up or living hours apart. A couple I know came to an end after the subject of travel was broached, they had been together for years but he didn't want to travel and she passionately did - so they finished and she started planning her trip. I know of another couple who broke up because the guy wanted to settle down together, with big plans for marriage and babies, but she wanted to keep her freedom and to work on her career first, so they broke up and moved on. What do all of these couples have in common? They're all in their twenties and their lives are ever changing and evolving - sometimes couples are on different wavelengths and that can mean different directions.
For me and Wolfy, I know that we are on the same wavelength but that after eight-and-a-half years we are being pulled in different directions. For me, I'm in a job that I just can't do any longer and I've reached a point in my life where I want to experience something new. It was a choice between moving away for work or travelling, and that decision was a simple one for me. For Wolfy, he regrets not putting in the time and effort for his studies and has realised he needs a change of career, so for him, the move is to retake his A-levels and go to university. The timing for us isn't great and we don't want to be apart, but we also both realise that we have to follow our individual dreams in order to be happy together. Neither of us should have to put our individual dreams on hold at this age, surely we will only end up resenting each other if we try? I'm not saying it's going to be easy - because I know it won't be. Saying goodbye earlier this week was the hardest thing I have ever done. But for us, this isn't a break up, more like hitting pause on things until we can resume play. We hope that it will be just six months until we are reunited in Australia - that might be naive on our part, or it might be a mature decision that works out really well. Either way, all we can do is hope that things work out for us. I've always believed that everything happens for a reason - I'm not always sure what that reason is but I know that it will all work out in the end. And I'm treating this just like that - it doesn't mean being separated is any easier, but it does mean we can hope that if we are meant to be together that it will work out.
I'd love to hear your stories of when you've been forced to choose between love and your career, or family, or even travel, like I have. Did it work out for you? Or do you still regret the one that got away?
Just a quick post today to share with you guys how I spent my New Year's Eve - as you can imagine I'm completely up to my eyeballs in packing, organising paperwork and trying to find everything I need for the next year - yikes! So this post is just a little one to mark another Happy New Year spent with the boys - my last one for a while. We've been having a New Year's party together for years now so it will be strange to spend the next one away from them all. But we made sure this was a good one - me and Wolf whipped up some Mexican food and supplied the tequila - the boys brought the fun. We had a great night, all rounded off with some very bad dancing. Hope everyone else's New Year celebrations were as much fun.Of course there was talk of what our New Year's resolutions might be, but we all agreed there is very little point in making a resolution when we're all happy the way we are. Also - I certainly don't want to come back from travelling to find out they have all changed! All this New Year New Me rubbish... I think we're all getting a bit old for that - if we really wanted to make a change, we would just do it and there would be no reason to wait for the New Year. I made my change months ago and next week it will finally begin! Bring it on! I hope that however you spent your New Year, that it was full of family and friends, and plans for the future. Whatever 2015 has in store for you, make it a big year!
How did you celebrate New Year? What have you got planned for 2015?