Finishing university can often feel like climbing off a rollercoaster you've been riding for three years – what are you supposed to do after graduation? It can feel like a bumpy ride back to reality and can bring some students crashing back to earth. I won't lie, it's not all sunshine and roses entering the world of work and starting to find your place. But it is also a time of huge growth and exciting steps towards building your dream life. Think of university kind of like a training ground. It's an extended childhood where you have to tick boxes and make sure to attend your classes. So when you finally leave, it's freedom like you've never had before.
It can be daunting for some people, to suddenly have full control over your life and choices. But this is a time to celebrate. After months of stressing over revision and exams, you can finally breathe. Of course we all dream of that 1st or 2.1, getting the job of our dreams and moving into a fabulous apartment with friends. But the reality can be a bit different for some. Many students are forced to move back in with their parents after graduation either because of the lack of jobs. Or simply because having a degree just isn't enough any more. Competition is fierce and it all comes down to what sets you apart from the crowd. Want to know the best way to succeed at post-graduation life?
If you really want to stand the best chances of landing yourself a job after graduation, start preparing early. It's so easy to treat university like one endless party and to not actually think about why you are there. It's a training ground, and one of the last times in your life where it is easy to get experience in a number of fields. Use your time wisely and experiment with your passions – try as many new experiences as possible! This can really help you to decide what career you might want to move into. For instance, I went into an English Language and Communication degree with plans of becoming a teacher. But came out a journalist and now I'm working in SEO and travel writing. Expect to go on your own career journey over the next decade – but take the opportunity to learn a lot early on.
The main thing is don't think of university as a time to relax. Sure, have fun and enjoy student life, but its also such a valuable time to develop your skills. I really wish I had started blogging while at university so I could have had more free time for it before starting full time work. During my time at university, I focused on writing for various online publications and started building my portfolio. I also spent time getting work experience at various newspapers and magazines, which led to a weekly column in a newspaper and later on, a job.
So you've finally graduated – what now? It can seem like a big crazy world but the sooner you start putting yourself out there, the more manageable it will seem. Now is the time to make some big choices about where you're going to live, work or if you want to continue to study. These are all things to consider when going into your final year of university, but you may be limited on what you can organise until you have finished your studies. The most important thing is to not put too much pressure on yourself. Not all career journeys look the same so don't worry if things don't happen the way you expect.
Living with your parents after university isn't ideal but it can give you the opportunity to save some serious cash. Low or now rent is not to be sniffed at when you're in an entry level job, internship or finding it difficult to find a job. If you've been unable to work alongside your studies, you may find you need some time to help your bank balance break even before you can afford to live out again. Don't see it as a failure, instead think of it as an opportunity to save a lot of money to either move out, buy a home or even go travelling. Start putting aside a portion of your earnings into a high interest savings account, ISA or even a Help To Buy account and don't touch it.
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The only way to get anything in this world is to make it happen. Don't just sit there waiting for jobs to land in your lap – get out there and make the most of every opportunity. Of course your main focus should be applying for jobs and finding paid roles – we've all got to make money. But if the job offers aren't rolling in at first and you have the time/money, this is a great time to apply for internships, work experience and graduate programmes. Why not apply for extra training or even volunteering to build your CV.
Lay the seeds, get involved in companies you would like to work for. Even if they have no vacancies, make contact, put the time in and ask them for work experience and advice. By doing this you could end up as a first choice if they suddenly need extra workers or to replace someone who leaves abruptly. Try starting a new project such as a blog or website that you can build into something bigger. Or get involved with one that is already established by offering your services for free. Follow your hobby, I followed mine and ended up the editor of an online magazine which led to journalism and travel blogging.
Read: Why you should always always answer when opportunity knocks
It's easy to feel like you're not doing enough, or that you're a failure for not having a high-flying job straight away. But the truth is, those first years out of university are a struggle. It's starting at the bottom rung of a new career, feeling intimidated by everything and trying to learn it all at once. Sometimes that means getting it wrong – but that's how we learn. It's okay to not have the perfect job, apartment and life lined up straight away. Lose your expectations and instead focus on following your passions and your dream career. These next few years are the time to really get your head down and work hard.
But don't forget to have fun! This will also be the first time in your life that you are earning a full-time wage. And the last time you have no responsibilities. It's a good time to start saving, but don't forget to treat yourself. It's a time for gigs, festivals, holidays and enjoying life.
What's your plan after university? What helped prepare you for the world of work?
This mid-twenties crisis post was one I originally put together around five years ago, but it seemed good timing to give it a bit of a makeover just a few months before my 30th birthday. A lot's changed in the last five years and you know what? I was wrong about a lot of what I said five years ago. Perhaps it was a touch of naivety, or a dash of innocence that skewed my views. But I'm never afraid to hold my hands up and say when I'm wrong. At the time, I really thought a mid-twenties crisis was no big deal and was totally blown out of proportion. But now I see how important they really are.
I think more so for millennials than any other generation that has come before us. Having a real crisis of confidence in ourselves, our choices and the lives that have been set out for us. It's an important part of growing up, to suddenly realise the world isn't what you have been taught it is. It's a drastic unlearning of an entire lifetime of social conditioning and there's no denying it can be a traumatic experience for some. I hate the term millennial, but it's important to refer to this generation. Why are we so affected? Well it's simple, during our lifetimes we have see the most dramatic change to the way we live and earn money than the generations before us. The expectations still hang over us from those who have gone before us and yet we're living in an entirely different world.
Read: The VICE Guide to Getting Through a Mid-Twenties Crisis
Hands up if you hit your mid-twenties and suddenly started questioning everything? Yup, me too. It's a time in our lives when we're finally out of full time education. We are finally set up in a job or still hunting, and we're starting to actively think about the future. It can be a crazy time – stuck somewhere in that limbo between being a wild teenager/student and adulthood. For some, it's the first real freedom we have to earn and spend money as we wish. To party when we want and live far from home. For others, it's a massive adjustment to a life where they have to be responsible for themselves and finally see how they handle adult life. It can be a real wake-up call to find out how much it costs to be an adult, and how many worries are involved.
Suddenly there is all this pressure to have a great job and career, to have a partner and start moving towards marriage and kids. Everyone looks like they're achieving so much and social media becomes a game of keeping up with the Jones's. All of this costs money and let's be honest, there's not actually that much of this flying around. Before you know it, you're overwhelmed with this feeling that you're not doing enough. That you don't know which way to turn. Fears of being stuck in the wrong career, worries of being alone forever. Or being stuck with the wrong person and missing out. It can be a really stressful time and the fact that no-one really talks about this, just makes it even worse. We internalise the whole experience and don't realise everyone is going through the same.
Read: How to power through your quarter-life crisis
For those entering your mid-twenties now, take it from those who are just starting to see the light at the other end of the tunnel. You're not alone, everyone goes through this weird period in their life and it can seem pretty hopeless and confusing. But as crazy as it is at the time, having a mid-twenties crisis can be really valuable to your life. It gives you an opportunity to completely change your life plans at a moment's notice, while still within the safety of youth. Trust me, the earlier in life you decide to make these decisions, the better. It becomes much harder to completely change your career, to chase family life or move abroad the later you leave it. It may seem crazy at the time, but crazy is good when it pushes you out of your comfort zone.
My mid-twenties crisis was the defining moment of my life. I look back now and I see I originally wrote this blog post, two years before my life changed forever. I was working as a journalist post-university and was in a long-term relationship of nine years. But deep down there was always a part of me that wanted so much more. Fast-forward a year and I snapped, I said no to the job that was driving me to exhaustion and underpaid me. I said no to the boyfriend who cheated and lied. Most importantly, I said yes to travel. I had always wanted to travel the world and to live abroad independently. I made my own dreams come true. Five years later I've lived and travelled nearly 40 countries and set up my own online business.
It can be easy to lose yourself in the small decisions when the big ones become too intimidating. Before you know it, you're staring at an avocado in the supermarket and feel unable to make even the smallest of choices over what to have for dinner that night. In this world of constant productivity being marked as a sign of success, it's so easy to lose the real value of time out. If you're overworked and find it hard to say no, you may find yourself suffering from burnout. Draining you of your passion, energy and interest in your own existence, it can leave you feeling numb and directionless.
Read: 6 ways to focus on your happiness and wellbeing in 2019
Have you suddenly realised you've achieved all that was expected of you, but it's not what you want? It's easily done, from a young age we're shepherded through education – told to be quiet and score high. We're pushed towards university as the only option and then towards our first job. But quite often we find ourselves in a career that doesn't actually suit the person we really are. The problem is we spend our whole lives trying to be what is expected of us, only to find that actually isn't success.
My sister for example, studied to become a fashion buyer only to find she hated the actual job and most of all, the people she worked with. She has since completely retrained to become a personal trainer. I was working as a journalist, only to find myself disillusioned by the media and preferring a self-employed life. It can be super scary to completely change your career, but it's the best time to do it and start from the bottom.
Read: Why you should always always answer when opportunity knocks
This one is really important and many of us go through a massive cull of friendships and relationships during this period of our lives. It's a good time to really ask yourself what people are bringing to your life and whether their friendship might actually be harming your mental health. So many of us get into relationships quite young, and as we grow and change, we want different things in life. It can seem scary to end relationships, but it's not a sign of failure, more a sign of growth and change.
Some people grow together, and others grow apart. It might be that a relationship becomes a negative factor in your life. That a person makes you feel bad or guilty for not being the person you were five years ago. It might be a cheating or toxic relationship, or a manipulative friend, or someone who just wants you to be their friend when it suits them. Those people who bring constant drama into your life? They're not friends, they're just the kind of people who need an audience.
Read: Relationships: What's it like to have a boyfriend at university?
It's amazing what you can see with the benefit of hindsight. I remember being in my early twenties and really just not seeing a way out. When I would cry in the toilets at work because I was so stressed. I felt lonelier in my relationship than I ever have while I've been alone. It was really tough for a while, but I'm so glad I went through that time because it pushed me to make big changes. Reaching that point forced me to push myself out of my comfort zone on to a totally different path.
Five years later, and I'm still travelling the world, happier single than I've ever been and my career has gone from strength to strength. However hopeless it may seem at the time, out of those darkest times comes the brightest future. I know I would have really appreciated a guiding hand when I was going through it. So here are the five things I wish I had been told when I was going through a mid-twenties crisis:
Have you experienced a mid-twenties crisis? What has your quarter-life crisis taught you? What advice would you give to those experiencing this?
I've been reminiscing a lot lately about one of my favourite holidays ever - my 2012 trip to Malta with my boyfriend. Despite not being the most exotic, or the longest-haul journey I have ever been on, it was definitely up there as one of my favourites because there was quite simply so much to learn and explore.
We settled on Malta after realising that we could not afford to go to Italy with everything else we had planned and from our research we believed that Malta held many similarities, at least enough to keep us happy and not feel like we were sacrificing our summer holiday. Being a very inquisitive pair, we get bored easily and although we wanted to come back feeling refreshed and relaxed, we also wanted to have the opportunity to learn about a different culture by exploring the history and sights. Well, we certainly picked the right place because Malta boasts a rich heritage and culture that had us out almost every day walking across the rocky shores and through the bustling city of Valletta.
We stayed in Mellieha - an area more often chosen for holidays by Italian, Greek and German families as we found out, but which worked well to our advantage as we hate to go abroad and find ourselves surrounded by English people. It was beautiful, very hilly and incredibly traditional - the building pictured above was at the top of a steep hill leading down to the sea and the view at the top of this post is from the very top of the hill looking across the bay. Here we are enjoying a nice cold local beer (Cisk) at a tiny bar for locals we discovered after walking right to the top of the hill.
The fantastic bus services and ferry service (far superior to the UK in every way!) meant we were able to get out and about independently, even organising ourselves on to boat trips out to nearby islands Gozo and Comino. The size of the islands also meant it was very easy to travel right across the island several times during the day as you went between the sights.
I loved the boat trip over to the nearby islands - we travelled around the bay to see the caves surrounding the island and into Gozo harbour, then on to Comino where were able to get off the boat for a few hours.
This is me standing at the top of a rock looking over the Blue Lagoon on Comino - stunning clear waters between the two beaches that enticed us so much we decided to walk across the shallow bay and carry our bags above our head - it was deeper than I expected and being a shortie I did have to swim some of the way while my boyfriend laughed at me.
During the 10 days we spent in Malta we also took a trip to Valletta where we explored the cake shops hidden in the winding streets, explored the harbour and the cathedral, the Grandmaster's Palace, museums, the forts and library. It was an incredible day packed with history and culture, but unfortunately you were not allowed to take pictured in all of the places we visited so I only have the following:
It was a great day and I would heartily recommend that anyone visiting Valletta makes sure to pop into the Grandmaster's Palace to watch the changing of the guard, the fortifications, and St John's Co-Cathedral is nothing else - make sure to wear clothes covering your legs and arms out of respect.
Our hotel organised an evening visit to a Festa in a nearby village - a Saturday night packed with food, live music and entertainment, and fireworks. Perfect.
We had dinner at a restaurant overlooking the harbour in the village, fresh pasta and seafood - delicious, before heading round to the festa.
It was a lovely evening and one I would really recommend - the music was great and the fireworks were VERY impressive!
Then we spent a day trekking around Gozo and visiting all of the sights, we didn't make it to the temples unfortunately but managed to see a lot of other sights. One of my favourites was the Citadel which surrounded the town. Here I am standing at the top in the baking heat.
Then we moved on to the Azure Window - another favourite. Amazing to see the crashing waves powering through the window while we swam in a small tidal pool beneath - I loved visiting this spit and didn't want to leave, especially when we discovered a secret beach behind it and locals sitting by their "beach huts" next to the lagoon. This was the reason we missed the temples, but it was worth it.
This was followed by a trip back across the harbour as the sun was setting.
Malta was definitely one of my favourite countries I have ever holidayed in because there is just so much to do, but it is still a spectacular place if you just want to sit by the pool and relax - we did plenty of both, but my absolutely favourite thing we did there was EAT!
The food was incredible everywhere we went, from the local bakery where they sold spinach and cheese pastries, to The Arches restaurant which sold the finest quality (expensive but worth it) venison, lamb and wine - so good we went twice! If you ever travel there, be sure to eat and drink for it will make you very merry!
Pictures are all my own.
Cookie's Crab Shop is the perfect place to tempt yourself with delicious fresh seafood. Hidden in the countryside bordering the North Norfolk coast, in a tiny village called Salthouse. It's the perfect place to try some tasty local seafood. Last weekend's sunshine-filled days were the perfect opportunity to try it out. We headed out to the coast to try the shellfish after a mention of Cookie's Crab Shop the Sunday Times magazine.
Easy to find, and cute as anything. The restaurant - which was more of a cafe than anything else - looked out over the marshes. On a beautiful sunny day, Cookie's Crab Shop was the perfect setting for some fresh, Norfolk seafood.
The staff were friendly and efficient, welcoming us to a table outside. They were quick to tell us all about the latest catch and what were the best combinations. We chose prawn and garlic pate and potted shrimps to start. Followed by Royal crab salads and a tiger prawn salad for mains. The food was delicious. It couldn't have been fresher unless it jumped straight out of the ocean and on to my plate.
There was such a relaxed atmosphere at Cookie's Crab Shop. There was even the option of bringing along your own wine to accompany the food, as some of the diners had done. I would heartily recommend the place to anyone with a fondness for seafood or a wish to try crab as it should be served. The meal was followed by a drive through the stunning villages along the coast. With a quick stop in Thornham before we headed to Old Hunstanton to see my family's pretty little beach hut.
Have you eaten at Cookie's Crab Shop? Do you love seafood - what is your favourite dish?
