At the Blue Lagoon on Comino Island, off the coast of Malta

At the Blue Lagoon on Comino Island, off the coast of Malta

With everything that has been going on lately, I’ve really learnt the value of having a happy place that I can escape to in my mind when things get a bit too much. I was always one of those lucky ones before whose happy place was everyday life and I didn’t need to think about somewhere to escape to, but as happens to us all over time, it has become my haven of late.

I haven’t been the best-tempered person lately and have really lost my patience with a lot of things and people – perhaps a sign that I let people get away with too much or that I did far too much extra work before now and that I was just realising that I gain nothing from this. Perhaps just me getting annoyed at things that shouldn’t bother me because of my situation, but either way  – I have noticed the affect of my changes in behaviour on the people around me.

It is interesting to watch how people react to you differently when things like this happen. I am usually the brightest, most cheerful and upbeat person around who will do anything for anyone, is endlessly patient, will take on extra work with no complaints and who is always on hand to cheer people up or help them out. Since all my drama I have been a lot less patient with people, in fact its like my patience has snapped and I have been a lot less inclined to do special favours for people or to take on their workloads as well as my own. I’ll be honest, I have been snappy and sometimes outright rude, which has angered me further because I hate to be like this with people. However, I have had my eyes opened to quite how many people were abusing my kindness by getting me to do extra work for them simply because they were lazy. Now they just do it themselves rather than asking me – which is good and fair.

But after seeing how colleagues, friends and family were tiptoeing around me, I realised just how much my positive attitude affected others. It is astonishing the power that good manners, kindness and showing an interest in people can wield. Especially if it comes naturally to you – these people will in turn show interest and be happy and polite to both yourself and others and the chain carries on. It grows further and further until it affects everyone in the office, or family or friendship group. It really is amazing to see how a kind word or action to one person creates this ripple affect and the way that you become known for starting it off – eventually it may even find its way back to you.

It was this thought that made me realise that I needed to get my act together. That my behaviour affects too many people and that I am sending out these negative waves to the people around me which are just spreading further. I don’t want to be the sort of people that spreads negative energy or makes others unhappy – so I changed my behaviour and am trying to get back to that chipper individual who spreads light and laughter – even if I don’t feel like it inside.

How am I doing this?

Well, it’s simple. I’ve been making plans for the future that are giving me plenty to look forward to and plenty to keep my mind busy with planning. I’ve been creating new, happy memories with friends and family that keep me smiling. And I’ve been remembering good times, holidays and memories to get me through the days when things aren’t as bright.

One of these has become my happy place. See the picture at the top? It’s from what was one of my favourite holidays – out of all the tropical or adventurous holidays around the world, this was from a holiday with my boyfriend to Malta. On this day in particular, we went on a boat trip to the Island of Comino, where we sunbathed, rock climbed and explored the Blue Lagoon, even walking across the bay, through the waters with our bags held over our heads. We jumped off the boat and swam in the crystal clear waters and generally had an amazing day together. It was one of the best holidays for exploring and travelling around and it has become my go-to place for escaping reality for a little bit.

When you’re feeling blue – what happy place do you escape to?